Monday, September 30, 2013

A small goal

Last week "A Beautiful Mess" blog announced that they were having a sale on their e-courses so I jumped at the chance to buy their blog design and coding course. 

I've never really been happy with this little design here, but I've done a few different headers and occasionally changed something layout related, but overall I've always wanted some,thing more. I have a pretty good knowledge of Photoshop and illustrator and a little web coding knowledge so I know that I can get the look I want if I just take the time to invest in it. 

So I spent the $25 to learn a little, and to hope that spending a little money might make me more accountable to take the time to work on this little blogs design. 

Right now I'm in Step 1, which I like to call "pin all the pretty things". I think if you check out the pin board you'll find that I have a special liking for Kelly green and nature photos. 

Anyway, my second blogiversary is coming up in a few weeks so I'm going to see if I can maybe launch a new design around then.

Then, I really want to take blogging more seriously, start some weekly series I'm already scheming about and maybe start advertising and growing some readers. The whole thing makes me feel giddy, which I think means I should most definitely do it!


Wednesday, September 18, 2013

My Daily Project

I know it's a cliche, but time is going by really quickly.  Gavin learns new things and develops so fast that I can't keep track. 

When did he first coo?

When did he first smile at me?

For whatever reason, these developments have become very special to me, and I want to keep track. 

Before baby corner became baby corner, it was Michelle's corner. I had a little office set up complete with wall calendar. As baby corner developed, I left the calendar on the wall, knowing that I'd think of some use for it. 

So a couple of weeks ago, I decided to really devote myself to keeping track of those memories and started writing down a memory from each day.  It doesn't have to be anything monumental. Sometimes it's "we had a great conversation tonight" or "you were so fussy tonight!". Sometimes it's "you laughed for the first time at dad!" or "you kicked in the bathtub!"

It's my own way of "slowing" time. But also, of seeing growth. It's become one of my favorite parts of the day. I'll put you down to sleep and immediately start deciding on what to put down as our memory for the day. 

I don't know how long I'll keep it up, hopefully for a while. Even on nights (such as the last one) when Gavin doesn't want to take that last nap, or when it seems like all I do is nurse him for the last 3 hours of my day, the 20 seconds it takes write a memory centers me. It brings me back to how rewarding and refining being a parent really is. 

Monday, September 16, 2013

In my defense...

"In your defense, you had a lot going on."

This is what my mom told me after I emoji cried via text message to her the other day over not taking any photos of Nathan, Gavin, and myself all together at the hospital the day Gavin was born.

I'd just seen a beautiful new family of 3 photo over Facebook, which made me think, "hey, wait a second! I didn't think to do that!" Even after reading and pinning various "don't forget to do these things" posts, I neglected to capture that moment. That moment where we became three.

There are photos of me with the new mom exhaustion look, and Nathan with the new dad elation look. And I know I should be happy to have caught at least that. I know we're a family. And I'll never forget our first minutes in the OR where we became parents. Nathan was so proud that he was "blowing bubbles already" and I was so relieved he was crying so strong and so loud. And words will never describe my feeling when they laid him on my chest and he instantly went silent, recognizing my heartbeat.

The good news is there's still time. We can still capture the three of us. 

We are a family.

whether there's proof or not.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Ready to Change

I know I shouldn't talk about it.

No one wants to read about politics and wars when they're used to seeing squishy baby photos.

But I can't help put feel pulled to the biggest topic at hand.

Syria.  To war or not? Or does anyone else realize that this would be a war?

That's the thing. I don't know. Would America's role be warlike? Would there be soldiers? How many? on the ground or in the air? Does it matter?

All of these questions and I feel like I can't find the answers. Newscasters and public figures are asking me to call my representatives and make sure they know we don't want any part of it. Activists and humanitarians telling me it's my duty to protect the innocent.

I'm sort of the pacifist of my family. I'm not a gun rights supporter, but I'm certainly not anti-gun.  I think that God has said over and over that he alone serves justice and vengeance, so perhaps I never should...

But I'm tired of being uninformed. I'm tired of being told what my stance should be, and furthermore, being scrutinized for it. 

So this is my answer. I'm neutral for the moment. But I may not be for long. The internet is immediately available, as are notable resources. I can make an informed decision, and so can you.

I guess what I'm saying is that we are a generation that can make a difference. Missing persons are found through social media. We ban together for a good cause. We can learn anything and try everything we want to. Why not use our time to create. Why not use our time to educate and inform.

I'm not great at this. I have been watching Breaking Bad on netflix for the past 2 weeks (that walter white is cray...) But I want to know. I don't want to shrug anymore. I don't want to let anyone decide for me. I have no intention of blabbing to the world my opinions just for recognition and debate. This is strictly personal.

I just wanted to share that I've had a bit of a change of heart.

I feel lazy, and even justified in that laziness because heck, I work all day and then nurse a baby for basically 2 straight hours and then it's time to clean and pack lunch and pack the diaper bag and shower and actually take advantage of the next (probably 4 hours) before I wake up again by sleeping for a bit. But as I was listening to npr (old person alert) this morning, I realized that I couldn't take a side because I don't have the information. 

I want the information.

So yeah. thanks little internet nook of mine. always the sounding board that you are.


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